I believe birthdays can be a great time for looking forward. My daughter shared a birthday ritual with me a few years ago and I want to share it with you. It involves setting a theme or intention for the year. I like to use a rhyme because it helps me choose a theme and it’s also fun! For example, last year when I turned 62 my intention was “ 62, try something new”. And, I am happy to report that I tried lots of new things during the year; a new puppy, traveling to meet sober friends, hosting a coaches retreat, growing my business to new levels…it’s been amazing! This year, at 63, I am still deciding: it could be ‘set yourself free’, or ‘focus on me’ but I am leaning towards “63, let it be”. As someone who struggles with hyper-productivity and restless saboteurs, this is an important focus area for me. Perhaps it would serve me well to let the things I have created, all the ‘new’ settle and grow.
I think birthdays can also be a time of reflection. If you missed last week, it was all about regret and reflection. My daughter also shared a ritual to look back over the decades – what was my life like 10 years ago, 20 years ago, 30 and so on. This can be a fun trip down memory lane and also help us celebrate our achievements and our growth.
I will be sharing more about boundaries in the coming weeks as I am facilitating a workshop for a small group. We are using the book and workbook from Nedra Glover Tawwab.
The fascinating thing about boundaries is how universally terrible we are at them. Setting them, keeping them and understanding them. It’s also
interesting that in our small group we have a variety of struggles, some of us are struggling to be less rigid and try saying yes more often. And, some of us have the opposite issue, we are struggling to say no without waffling, long explanations or guilt.
One reason boundary work is so important is that it really is the cornerstone of good communication. Without boundaries we are ‘flying blind’ and expecting the people in our lives to be mind readers.
Ultimately, boundaries are about self care.
At the recent Sober In The City event my bookclub partner Sarah had a table to share about bookclub and my other programs. I decided to make up card for ‘Book Club Bingo’ as a way to engage the audience. I realized that having a Bingo Card is a fun prop for other events as well, such as: birthdays, Sober October and more! I have created a card just for you.